Friday, April 18, 2014

Sex, lies, and videotape — Trailer Reviews for April 18

Spring —  a time of rebirth, renewal, and hope. It's upon us again, and with it, some new movie trailers that are hoping to convince you to part ways with the $12 in your wallet to spend two hours inside a movie theatre instead of outside enjoying the fresh air.



I wrote a little bit about the 53 second teaser that was released for this film a few months back. We know a lot more about this movie know — Scarlett Johansson plays an alien life form that seduces horny men from around Scotland to kill them, or something.

I'm not usually a fan of super-imposed quotes in trailers — it's usually a sing to me that the movie didn't have enough footage to promote itself, or it's just lazy editing. This trailer features some pretty bold words in its text ("a grand statement on what it means to be a human being"... really?) but I'm gonna give it the benefit of the doubt. The trailer is beautifully made, featuring some great shots at different locations, and Scarlett Johansson looks absolutely gorgeous in it.

The music in this trailer was huge for me too. Often time 'horror' trailers come off as cheesy and lame, but the music combined with the shots in this trailer were enough to give me an actual creepy sense of foreboding. I'm pumped for this movie now.

Trailer: 4 Stars
See It




Philip Seymour Hoffman died in February of a heroin overdose. No matter what you think about his lifestyle choices, or the fact that he left his family without him because of his addiction, you can't deny that he was a talented actor. He's one of my favourites, and I'll watch pretty much any movie he's in. He stars in "God's Pocket" alongside Richard Jenkins and Christina Hendricks (who will forever own a little piece of my heart for her role as Joan in Madmen).

After seeing that cast list, I was excited to watch this trailer. Unfortunately, I just didn't get the trailer. I have no idea what this movie is about. Hendricks' son dies? Is it gang related? Just a working-class town thing? Supernatural?

I'm confused. But I'll still go see the movie.

Trailer: 2 Stars
See it




Drugs, sex, money, youth, glory blah blah blah blah. This seems horribly written. "You know who has the sweetest, dankest, green on the — " shut up. Nobody talks like that.

Trailer: 1 Star
Skip It





Okay, this can be summed up by the movie poster.

Look, guys! We're wearing glasses! We're smart! We're clever writers! Come see our movie.

Not buying it, Kaley and Chris. Not. Buying. It.

The movie looks like a typical three act rom-com set in the the world of struggling writers (probably in LA). Rejection letters! Agents! I'll pass. Nice job on the callback question to Cuoco's character at the end, though.

Trailer: 2.5 stars
Skip It



Sex Tape (Red Band, NSFW)


First off, let me just say that I can't stand Cameron Diaz. I think she's talentless, I don't find her attractive, and I've always been confused about how she's famous.

On the other hand, Jason Segel is a beauty. Love that guy. I'll watch him in anything.

I can't say I believe, or like them as a couple, but I'll deal with it for this movie. With a July release date, "Sex Tape" clearly has eyes on being the "big comedy" of the summer (kind of like "We're the Millers") was last year. It should do pretty well, with a recognizable cast, "edgy" name, and this red band trailer getting around the Internet.

The trailer itself is awesome. I'm particularly partial to the cloud-based services joke. I love the cloud, man, but I have no idea how it works. It's a fucking mystery!

One thing that's stuck with me after watching the trailer a few times though.... Who gives out iPads to that many people? Rich people man. #FirstWorldProblems



2 comments:

  1. I agree with you on Cameron Diaz being "talentless", like Jerry Hall, Diaz is a "3 dressed up as a 9", tall, long legs and blonde, and that's pretty much it.

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